Hello World!!! Today, I try something new. Another creation of mine. Something that has been stuck in my head for some time – that I had to decide it was beyond time to finally, M-A-N-I-F-E-S-T.
My first experience shared with you will be one that to do with living in my community. It is not PG post, so I just wanted to forewarn.
Friday, September 11, 2020 – 8:30PM
I am Russell. For the most part, most of my life, I have always been him. Obviously as we grow in life we like to try new things, and sometimes do so by putting on new masks that let us feel liberated enough to try new things. In life this has rarely been the case for myself. I have never been a fake person (though often regarded to as one by people who wanted a bone to pick. But I always remained myself – Authentic. I might try new things or put on new masks, bit those actions were not acting. They were however attempts to make a newer, evolved, better Russell. Some things I liked and they stuck. Others which served no purpose, would be dismissed.
On this night in question I was a little hungry and wanted a snack. I thought to myself. I would get a cool drink, but what I really wanted was an ice cream. A Mexican paletta, quite in fact. I was probably feeling a little kiddish inside, because for some reason I was craving the sky blue, Bubble Gum, flavored paletta.
So I head out the house and make way down the the hood to the local cornerstore. Nick’s Market. Really should be called Little Nickies’ Marcket [Adam Sandler reference] – cause, truth is, sometimes, things pop off there. I head out the house and walk the few blocks. Pain in my big toe because more than likely than not, I was born with “Shaq Attack Feet,” and that just runs in the family. As I get to the end of my journey, I pull up to see the store in plain site.
I walk towards the end of the block, before I cross the street to get the corner store market. As I am about to cross I see this black sedan pull up and kind make a U-ey. You know, the turn. The back door opens up, and out steps this guy, across the street from the corner market.
Now I’m observant, so this is not all I’m seeing. And, anyways I’m just going to get a couple of snacks right. So my main focus be on the door of Nick’s Market. As I’m looking there I see this tall white guy standing there. Shirt, shorts, and some muddy, medium brown hair. Nothing that fazes me, just what I see. And, as I am pretty close to the guy I can see a leash and tiny toy dog attached to it. So, it clicks. “This guys is just out here waiting for someone and cannot go in because of the dog,” states, the voice, of my inner dialogue.
Now I’m approaching and no one notices me. Literally about 200 feet from the door. I take in the guy more who steps out of the vehicle. He is slightly short. Probably normal height for a man, but still shorter than me. Dressed real nice. All black, dress attire, with a few like red accents. Does not look like all put together right…little wrinkly, so I think he has probably been in the clothes for a while, or having fun. He stumbles a little as he gets out the vehicle, and slaps the back of the sedan, as it drives off, shouting something loud I could not understand. Okay, little out the norm, but nothing crazy, if your feeling happy. Then he starts to cross the street in front my line of sight walking the same direction that I do. I’m happy we will not cross paths and just keep mobbing to my destination.
I hear him drop a water bottle in front of me, as it slams on the pavement. Then he picks it up. The whole time, he is walking he is just talking out loud, laughing, and being strange. I start to come to understand this might be suspect. After he picks the bottle he walks across the street not straight like myself, but diagonally. As he walks he makes it directly to the same sidewalk I am heading to, but farther in front, of the tall White man who is holding the dog leash in his hands next to the cornerstore entrance.
I see him get close and I’m getting close too. All three of us are pretty much in the immediate vicinity of another.
This time I see the guy throw the water bottle at the floor, right in the corner where the pavement meets the curb. He throws it in anger like he is mad at someone, or something, and trying to hit them. All of sudden he like snaps, Sees the tall, skinny, white guy and starts talking some shit to him. With the first thing out his mouth, trying to incite him to fight, the hairs on my forearm can sense trouble.
He just keeps talking shit to the white guy, even more, a second, and the third time. Saying something to the effect of, “Fuck You, You want to fight, I’ll beat your ass right now.” Now this short, Latino, guy in nice black dress clothes, is small but aggressive. Extremely, and, for no reason at all. The white guy on the other hand, is timid, and he thinks the best way to act, is to say nothing. But the the brown man, who more than likely is Mexican, changed his walking direction, and started heading towards the white guy. Possibly ready to hit him. Definitely, without a doubt going to get in his face and talk more shit, bullying and humiliating this other guy. The little instigator just keeps talking smack and cursing at him. So as he changed his direction, he also intentionally started walking close to me. And I’m standing next the white kid now on his right, and all three of us are on the sidewalk in front of the door to Nick’s.
All that shit I saw was NOT going to fly in my book.
I was bullied like all my life. By little pieces of shit, that were not good enough, and were jealous because they could not compete with me as a kid. My answer was to ignore it, because I did not want to be a bad kid, get in trouble, or worse and most truthfully, I never wanted to get fucked in the eyes of the law, through the criminal justice system. As I grew up, I learned you get fucked by the law, kind of regardless as an individual citizen is always made lesser in the eyes of a law enforcement official when it is the State vs. Private Citizen. But, I also learned, you really cannot ignore a bully. Once they do something that shifts the power imbalance in the relationship, through demeaning you, and you ignore it, they basically act like they have their teeth sunk into you. Like a rabid, diseased, feral animal. In order to best deal with a bully, the best thing to do, is to stand up to them and confront them. So as an adult I learned to, and started to do, just that.
So that’s it. This shit basically hit a climax. And it could end up real bad for an innocent white man. 1). I am not going to be a party to and witness another party bully someone innocent or hurt then if I can do something about it or lend them a hand. 2). The Brown guy was picking on the White guy for no reason whatsoever, and I was not going to stand up for some prejudiced, reverse racism type of shit. Just so a human who chooses to be a peice of crap can get their jollies by messing with someone innocent. Just not me. Not the man, I want to be.
I SAID ENOUGH IS ENOUGH AND JUST ACTED – Instinctually.
I came out strong…Bullet Shell launching out a cannon, and said to the Latino guy. “You know what, Fuck You!” “YOU ARE NOT GOING TO DO SHIT TO THIS GUY!” ” I saw the whole fucking thing.” “I just walked up here and he was standing her not doing anything and you came up to him talking shit.”
Now the white guy is looking at me. He thought he was alone and fucked, but he just felt relieved the pressure of the climax and pending fight was off his back. Lucky him. But already my adrenaline kicked in, and I myself was not sure what would happen. Now this stunned the guy, and to make matters worse im no weenie. When I walk into a room, people always notice me, look, and, tend to be quiet. They rarely see a 500-lb gorilla walk into a room, and when they do, they rarely know what to do at first but the deer in the headlights look. My long beard and hair dont necessarily help to give me a calming look either, but I could care less. Mexican guy was quite shocked, went silent, but then started talking shit back to me an threatening me.
Then the Mexican guy starts talking shit to me. He starts saying, “Fuck Me!” And how he is going to whoop my ass. He also pulls out his phone and then starts talking like he is asking for permission from a boss from the hood to beat my ass, so their is no blowback on him after the fact. In hindsight that part is funny because it was fake as hell. But at the moment, I was thinking maybe this fool is calling the guys that just dropped him off in sedan and they would turn around and be right back, and quickly it would be a 3 on 1 fight, so I felt the blood pressure rise.
I stand strong, however and do not back down. His body language kind of got the hint, because there is this invisible line, he will not cross even if he is close to us and dumbly, agitated, acting like he is willing to get froggy and leap. I can tell he got the point and we are at an impasse. So I get ready to go in, but before I do, I say, “If I find out you fuck with him, I am going to come out of the store and stomp your ass out on this curb.”
I hate to be mean, but when I make a statement like that a person tends to think real hard about the fact if they really want to go through with it. I mean even if they now they can win the fight, it does not look like an easy challenge for them. So it is a good deterrent to potential problems or violence.
He just keeps talking shit to the white guy, even more, a second, and the third time. Saying something to the effect of, “Fuck You, You want to fight, I’ll beat your ass right now.” Now this short, Latino, guy in nice black dress clothes, is small but aggressive. Extremely, and, for no reason at all. The white guy on the other hand, is timid, and he thinks the best way to act, is to say nothing. But the the brown man, who more than likely is Mexican, changed his walking direction, and started heading towards the white guy. Possibly ready to hit him. Definitely, without a doubt going to get in his face and talk more shit, bullying and humiliating this other guy. The little instigator just keeps talking smack and cursing at him. So as he changed his direction, he also intentionally started walking close to me. And I’m standing next the white kid now on his right, and all three of us are on the sidewalk in front of the door to Nick’s.
All that shit I saw was NOT going to fly in my book.
I was bullied like all my life. By little pieces of shit, that were not good enough, and were jealous because they could not compete with me as a kid. My answer was to ignore it, because I did not want to be a bad kid, get in trouble, or worse and most truthfully, I never wanted to get fucked in the eyes of the law, through the criminal justice system. As I grew up, I learned you get fucked by the law, kind of regardless as an individual citizen is always made lesser in the eyes of a law enforcement official when it is the State vs. Private Citizen. But, I also learned, you really cannot ignore a bully. Once they do something that shifts the power imbalance in the relationship, through demeaning you, and you ignore it, they basically act like they have their teeth sunk into you. Like a rabid, diseased, feral animal. In order to best deal with a bully, the best thing to do, is to stand up to them and confront them. So as an adult I learned to, and started to do, just that.
So that’s it. This shit basically hit a climax. And it could end up real bad for an innocent white man. 1). I am not going to be a party to and witness another party bully someone innocent or hurt then if I can do something about it or lend them a hand. 2). The Brown guy was picking on the White guy for no reason whatsoever, and I was not going to stand up for some prejudiced, reverse racism type of shit. Just so a human who chooses to be a peice of crap can get their jollies by messing with someone innocent. Just not me. Not the man, I want to be.
I SAID ENOUGH IS ENOUGH AND JUST ACTED – Instinctually.
I came out strong…Bullet Shell launching out a cannon, and said to the Latino guy. “You know what, Fuck You!” “YOU ARE NOT GOING TO DO SHIT TO THIS GUY!” ” I saw the whole fucking thing.” “I just walked up here and he was standing her not doing anything and you came up to him talking shit.”
Now the white guy is looking at me. He thought he was alone and fucked, but he just felt relieved the pressure of the climax and pending fight was off his back. Lucky him. But already my adrenaline kicked in, and I myself was not sure what would happen. Now this stunned the guy, and to make matters worse im no weenie. When I walk into a room, people always notice me, look, and, tend to be quiet. They rarely see a 500-lb gorilla walk into a room, and when they do, they rarely know what to do at first but the deer in the headlights look. My long beard and hair dont necessarily help to give me a calming look either, but I could care less. Mexican guy was quite shocked, went silent, but then started talking shit back to me an threatening me.
I walk inside the the store and there are two women inside. One a customer, one a checker. They could hear the whole event through the door and they are just looking at me very serious, but slightly proud or amazed of my actions, but the women just stay quiet. I get a momentary jolt of happiness – you know Winners high – but without a doubt I know I have a sour angry look on my face. I turn left to the aisle of coolers until I come upon the one that has my can in it. You know the cold drink was drinking in my head on my walk over to Nick’s Market. ZAPOTE flavored. Not sure sure what that is, but I go crazy to try any new food product so the idea to douse it down has been stuck in my head since the I first saw the drink a few weeks back. 50% real fruit juice with real fruit chunks inside a tall aluminum can. Afterwards, I walk up to the freezer next to the register and claim my Bubble Gum paletta. I cash out and walk out thinking to myself what I might step into.
I scan left out the door, and thankfully, the moron is at the opposite end of the block. Then I walk in the opposite direction of him, but apparently he looked back and saw me. Because the next thing you hear is him talking shit to me all over again. You can hear all the way across the block. I tell him to com get some if he wants some. He pulls out his phone again. Does his stunting, fake call to his boss routine. Then he takes a few steps in my direction, but just stops. And after that I new it was over…however he would keep running his mouth.
I walk back across the street and meet up with the customer woman and the white man and we start to talking about. She says “he is just high, probably using meth.” I stop to think about it. Then tell her “yeah, you are right.” Its crazy the things drugs can do to a community, but it is good that we heros who stand together to fight against it.
In the PALM SPRINGS of WASHINGTON, most days go by smoothly, but every know and again you bite into an apple with a worm in it. ð<9f>¤£